Blame it On The Locusts

The best excuses for poor earnings culled from MSN Money...

Columbia Sportswear said it saw a particular weakness in North American outwear orders for March. The reason was poor weather conditions last fall. Of course, nobody would want to buy outerwear when the weather is bad.

Jacuzzi said spa sales were off because of an unusually wet winter. Are Jacuzzi users really that concerned about getting wet?

Medical device company Criticare blamed sluggish 1Q05 sales on hurricanes, which canceled no less than three "major oral surgery sales conferences." Sounds like mother nature has a vendetta.

Overstock.com's CEO said slow sales at the beginning of April may be attributed to the death of John Paul II. His Holiness was a big customer you know.

Electronics retailer Tweeter pinned weak 1Q comp sales on the Super Bowl shifting from February to January. They neglected to mention that the Super Bowl was also played in February last year, the comparable period. Oh yeah.

Dreamworks Animation which badly missed 1Q profit estimates as expected revenue from home video sales of "Shrek 2" failed to materialize. Dreamworks did not record any revenue in the quarter from "Shrek 2" other than licensing and merchandising.

CEO Jeffrey Katzenberg; "it is clear in retrospect that the unique blockbuster characteristics of Shrek 2 caused us to overestimated first quarter retail sales,"
File this one next to overstatement and understatement.

Bob Evans restaurants have been trying to explain poor restaurant sales for five months and they take the cake:

December 2004: "a shift in the timing of the Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years." It's a real pain when Christmas falls in December.

January 2005: "severe winter weather" but apparently that "unfavorable shift in the timing of the year-end holiday period" messed up January as well.

February 2005: "value initiatives, including reduced prices on a number of Bob Evans' most popular breakfast and dinner items" that "appear to have been well-received by consumers." You cut prices and revenue still went down, not good.

March 2005: "renewed softness appears to reflect the timing of our marketing programs as well as the significant increase in gasoline prices during the month." Ok, so even with reduced prices, the customer could not afford to show up.

April 2005: Let's see, they've used, weather, gas, the calendar and bad marketing timing. Anything left? "Same-store sales at Bob Evans Restaurants were again disappointing in April, and restaurant segment operating margins for the quarter continue to be depressed," This is called finally giving up on the blame game.

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